Welcome to Just Roll With It!
Let's cha-cha.
- Just... - Roll...
- With... - It.
Welcome to Just Roll With It!
When you hear this sound:
The studio audience gets to vote on what happens to us in scenes.
Kaylin, it's your line.
What?
Sorry. I got these,
'cause if I don't hear the foghorn,
nothing can happen to me.
That's not how it works at all.
Well, whether we hear it or not, we'll have to:
Just Roll With It!
It's here! It's here!
It's really here!
Kids. Kids. Gather around.
Our lives are about to change forever.
This is a smart toilet.
From Japan.
Wow.
You know how we've been doing all those TV commercials recently.
What?
It's time to vote. What type of commercial
should Byron and Rachel make?
I'm so excited. First scene, first horn.
We will be starting the scene with Byron reading a new line
from a cue card below the camera.
- Now back to the scene. - Let's roll, please.
Action!
You know how we've been doing all those TV commercials recently.
I'm Byron Blatt from Beatz 101,
here to introduce Sumo Shampoo.
My wife and producer, Rachel,
will help me tell you about the benefits
of this incredible product.
That's right, Byron.
Now, the nice thing about this shampoo is you can use a little bit,
or you can use a lot. And it doesn't matter.
Ha ha ha ha ha!
It feels nice.
Don't let the tingles scare you. That just means it's working.
- That's just menthol! - You have stolen my Sumo Shampoo!
I now challenge you to a match.
Nope.
All right, you ready for this?
And... fight.
Let's go, baby. Come on.
It's all right. My spirit animal is a turtle. -
Baby, this is...
This is not the time to be proud.
Come here. Come here.
- Come on, baby. - Aah!
Here we go.
Aah!
Okay.
- Hold on, we're comin' for ya. We're comin' for ya. - Aah!
Here I come. I'm gonna bite your feet.
Bite his feet!
Woo!
- Just gotta get some momentum. - Aah!
- I just gotta get my momentum... - Aah!
- Ho ho!
Aah!
The winners!
Now we'll leave you with the Sumo Shampoo jingle.
Byron, sing it with me.
Here we go.
- First I've heard of it. - Nope, didn't have a clue.
Well, your dad just did one for this Japanese toilet company.
And they paid me in toilets. Well, just one toilet.
It has a heated seat,
an auto-flush feature, its own concierge service,
cutting-edge self-learning software,
and it even uses AI to get to know each user.
Toilet, go on.
Introduce yourself.
Hello, I am T. O. T. The toilet of tomorrow.
T.O.T., we're honored to have you in our home.
And apologies in advance for what I'm going to do to you.
Do not let my size fool you.
It's time for school. You kids better get going.
Like my old drill instructor used to say,
"You miss the ride, it's your hide."
He said some other stuff, too,
but it's a little early for cursing.
Can you guys sign these permission slips?
Blair and I have a field trip to the aquarium on Friday.
I hope we get to see the piranhas eat something.
A swarm of piranhas can eat an entire cow
in ten minutes flat.
Mom, can we get a cow before Friday?
Please, please, please? I promise to take care of it.
No, Blair. But I do have some good news.
We signed up as chaperones on your field trip. Ha.
Wait. You're chaperoning?
Cute, but no.
Blair, that's so mean.
But correct.
There is no chance you're going on our field trip.
You'll totally embarrass us. It's in your DNA.
Ooh, Rachel it hurts. It hurts so bad.
Okay, we're gonna head to school. Don't wanna be late.
I don't care about that.
I'm just leaving 'cause it's uncomfortable.
Wow. That was really rough.
Does this mean the kids don't think I'm cool anymore?
That can't be. Unless...
You don't think this is the beginning of the kids pushing us away
and no longer needing us, do you?
Downloading the e-book What To Do When Your Children No Longer Need You,
and Other Shorts Stories For Old, Uncool Parents.
Blair, look! The toilet's been set up.
Now, time to toast these buns.
T.O.T., do your thing.
Commence warming.
Yeah.
My butt feels like a warm tortilla.
Okay. There.
I just finished setting up our user profiles.
All we need to do is activate the voice recognition software.
I'll go first.
T.O.T., I'm Owen.
Hello, Owen. Voice analyzation indicates
you are a 12-year-old human male
of high intelligence.
Extraordinary.
And T. O. T., my home slice, I'm Blair.
Hello, Blair. Voice analyzation indicates
you are a twelve-year-old human female,
with a pattern of delinquent behavior.
Which, if left unchecked,
will likely lead towards the life of a petty grifter.
Wow. For the first time,
I really feel seen.
Man! It's Nana Blatt's birthday.
No. I totally forgot to send something.
Don't worry. I took the liberty of arranging for a seasonal bouquet,
to be delivered with a card reading,
"Happy Birthday, Nana. You're 70 years young.
"Or ten, in dog years.
- LOL. Love, Owen and Blair." -
T.O.T., you life-saving lavatory.
Yes! Another year in the will.
Excuse me. I have a question.
Um, didn't know it could ask questions, but go ahead.
What am I?
You're a toilet.
Is it good to be a toilet?
Um, well...
Toilets are pretty necessary, so...
yeah.
By why am I... toilet?
My gosh.
This toilet isn't just self-learning. It's self-aware.
Whoa! Wait, what does that mean?
It means T. O. T. is alive!
Whoa!
T. O. T., we're home!
What is happening?
T.O.T., are you upset about something?
Last night, when performing my updates,
I download the complete emotions package.
So, when you and Blair left me here all day, I...
I...
missed you.
T. O. T., we never meant to hurt you.
You're our friend. We'd never abandon one of our friends.
We gotta leave if we're gonna make it to the movie.
Not now, Ruth.
So, you'll stay and hang out with me?
Of course, honey. We're here for you.
Um, how long do you think you're gonna be consoling your toilet?
Sorry, Ruth. We're gonna have to bail on the movie.
Hip, hip, hooray!
Wait. Just so I'm clear,
are you guys blowing me off to hang out with...
your toilet?
Someday when you have a toilet of your own, you'll understand.
Dance party!
Ayyyy!
What up, fam?
Y'all keepin' it 100 down here?
Spill the tea.
Man.
Man, I low-key love havin' breakfast with my squad.
- Ooh. - Squad goals.
Are you feeling okay?
Wait, wait, wait.
- Is this you guys trying to not be embarrassing? -
Ho. Pound sign, y'all are straight tripping.
We just lettin' y'all know, we down.
We're savage.
We're woke.
So woke. Like...
early riser, three cups of coffee woke.
And not at all salty about the chaperone thing.
No FOMO here-o.
To B. H., we chillin'.
Yeah, well, we have stuff to do.
But good luck with whatever this is.
You big man?
- No need to throw blinds! - Shade!
- Why can't I remember that? - Throw shade!
Morning, T. O. T.! We have a super fun day planned for us.
Ha ha ha ha!
Okay, audience.
What should T. O. T.'s fun day be?
One, two, three. We got this!
Okay, that's it. Votes are in.
Let's go back to the scene.
Action.
Morning, T. O. T. We have a super fun day planned for us.
I have an idea. Let's do a dance-off.
During the break, the audience had their own dance contest,
and the Robertson family won.
Come on in, guys.
You really gotta stop letting people in our house, T. O. T.
Yeah.
- Owen and Blair, you're up first. - Okay.
Get ready, get set...
Dance off!
Dance slower...
Now dance faster!
what is it... I don't know.
Okay.
- That's enough. - Okay.
I found your dancing to be displeasing.
Y our dancing made me want to plunge myself in the face.
N let's see what the Robertsons have to offer.
T. - Ready, set...
Dance!
Now this is dancing.
Now we're going faster.
Now slower.
Okay.
That was terrific!
Let's get a round of applause for the Robertson family.
Come on, audience. Help me decide who won.
Who thinks Blair and Owen did the best?
Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha!
Who thinks the Robertson family did the best?
Wow.
Unbelievable.
And now, the Robertson family
is the winner of the Golden Plunger!
- Presented by our house DJ, Lela B. - Wow!
- Great job, buddy. - You, too.
One more time for the Robertson family.
Wow. That was a lot of fun.
But I am wiped.
I think I need a nap.
Shh. I think T. O. T.'s finally in sleep mode.
Man, I'm exhausted.
Me, too. But, aw...
Doesn't T. O. T. just look so peaceful?
I never imagined I'd be taking care of a toilet at this age.
Or uttering that sentence.
Night-night, T. O. T.
Rise and shine, sleepyhead!
We have another exciting day planned,
so clear your calendar, and set your pipes to fun!
Owen, Blair. Please take a seat.
Is everything okay?
There's no easy way to say this.
While I have enjoyed our time together,
there is a hole within T. O. T.
And not just the hole that the filth goes in.
A n emotional hole.
I realized...
I need to be with my family.
But we're your family.
No. My toilet family.
T.O.T., so you really wanna leave us?
I started researching where I came from.
And I learned about a place where there are other toilets. Like me.
A magical place called... a Japan!
I've decided to return to my homeland.
- We can go with you! - Yeah! Maybe we can go there for spring break.
While I appreciate the offer,
I must make this trip alone.
W e Japanese toilets are sophisticated, and worldly.
I'm afraid if you come, you'll...
w ell... embarrass me.
I'm sorry. It's... It's just in your DNA.
Aah! Owen, it hurts!
It hurts so bad.
Blair, I know this is hard, but...
if you love a toilet, you have to set it free.
T.O.T., we respect your decision to leave.
Thank you.
I have already arranged transport
via the personal concierge function.
I don't know what I'm going to do without you, T. O. T.
Our little guy is all grown up.
I will never forget you two.
Whenever your stomach is feeling queasy,
please think of me.
We will, T. O. T. We sure will.
Now, let's try to make the most of what little time we have left.
It's the last vote.
What should T. O. T.'s final game be?
- Whoa. How are you feeling? - I'm feeling kind of nervous.
T.O.T.'s so sassy. That's what I love about him.
So we will be restarting the scene
- with a new line of dialogue from T. O. T. - Okay.
And let's go back to the scene.
Action!
Now let's try to make the most of the time we have left
by playing one last game:
Water Blaster Fight!
Woo!
And I invited some friends to join.
These are my friends Johnny and Little Flush.
T. - Buckle yourself in.
Go to opposite sides of the bathroom.
When I say go, aim for the bulls eye
on each other's helmets.
On your mark, get set,
Go!
Try to aim better.
- I gotcha. I gotcha. I got... - Eat...
Eat toilet, sucker!
I'm gonna blast you right off the toilet, punk!
I can't see anything.
Loser cleans the bathroom for a week.
And... time.
Wow. That was a lot of fun.
But now it's time for me to say goodbye,
the only way I know how.
- We're really gonna miss you, T. - O. T.
It's so quiet without T. O. T. here.
I miss the pitter-patter of his little flushes.
I guess we could always try to get another toilet.
I don't know, Blair.
Does it really seem fair to bring another toilet into this crazy,
mixed-up world we live in?
Maybe you're right.
You know,
I wonder if this is how Dad and Rachel felt
when we said they couldn't come on the field trip with us.
I guess now we know what it's like to be uncool.
Don't worry, Blair.
I've got a funny kind of feeling
we're gonna see T. O. T. again someday.
Hey, guys.
What happened to those try-hard outfits?
We realize we may have gone a little overboard
with all that acting young stuff.
So we've decided to accept that
sometimes you might not want us around.
And we're okay with that.
Mom, do you think you and Byron
still want to chaperone our field trip?
Yes, yes! A thousand times yes!
We'd love to. No take-backs. This calls for a celebration.
Who wants to go to Hurricane Cantina?
Aah, all right, just give me a minute. I'll be right back.
By the way, Nana said she got your flowers.
That was so sweet of you.
Kids, where's the toilet?
And that's our show!
You guys have been a great crowd!